What Is Our Human Nature?

Ella Al-Shamahi with a shell necklace. Taken from Episode 1 of Human on BBC.

There’s a long-running debate about what “human nature” really is. Some people say it’s competition, aggression or self-preservation. Others see it as empathy, creativity and co-operation. When we look at the world today, with war, conflict and division, it’s easy to assume that violence is simply “who we are.” But is that the full picture?

Anthropology offers another perspective. I have been watching the BBC series Human with Paleoanthropologist Ella Al-Shamahi (I highly recommend this, it’s fab!) In the show Ella points to one of the first markers that distinguished us from other primates: the making of shell necklaces. These weren’t just decorative objects, they represented something deeper; the desire to express, symbolise, connect and share. Unlike monkeys, who live and survive socially but without symbolic culture, humans began to create meaning that stretched beyond survival. A string of shells wasn’t food or shelter, it was the communication of belonging.

To me, this says something profound about human nature. Our earliest distinction as a species wasn’t the ability to fight harder or dominate more. It was the ability to connect and to create meaning together.

Yet in times of war and hate, that truth can feel buried. We’re told “this is just human nature”, as though we’re doomed to repeat cycles of violence. However, if we take seriously what our origins show us, perhaps it’s the opposite. Disconnection, hate and destruction are signs of us being out of step with our nature, not living it.

As a counsellor, I see this on an individual level too. People often come to therapy carrying messages about themselves; that they are unlovable, broken or destined to struggle. Yet when given the conditions of acceptance and understanding, what often emerges is a longing to connect, with themselves, with others and with something bigger too.

Shifting our view of “human nature” is more than a theory or a nice idea. In a world that pushes division, choosing to meet ourselves and others with openness, curiosity and connection is a radical act. It resists the narrative that hate is inevitable. It says, we are here together. We have survived together, not as isolated individuals, but as communities who relied on one another for safety, knowledge and care.

What makes us human is not standing alone and destroying each other, but learning from each other, creating bonds and growing as a whole species. Our survival has always depended on connection. Remembering this means living closer to what truly makes us human.

Perhaps that’s my challenge for you: to remember that our ancestors’ hands strung shells not for competition, but to share meaning and connection. When we embody that truth in our nature, we can live as who we have always been and shape a world that honestly reflects our humanity.