Things to Consider Before Starting Therapy

In today’s world, counselling looks different for everyone. Some people sit in a cosy therapy room with their counsellor, sharing a space where silence, emotion, and connection can unfold naturally. Others speak to their therapist from home, curled up with a cup of tea, connecting through a screen.

Both face-to-face and remote counselling offer valuable support, but they also come with different dynamics. Choosing what works best for you is important, as is understanding the boundaries that shape a healthy therapeutic relationship.

Face-to-Face Counselling: Being in the Room

For some, there’s something irreplaceable about being physically present with a counsellor. The space itself can feel like a sanctuary; somewhere separate from daily life, where emotions can be expressed and processed in real-time.

Benefits of in-person counselling:

·      The physical presence of another person can feel grounding and reassuring.

·      The environment is neutral, away from home distractions.

·      Non-verbal communication is clearer, making it easier to feel seen and understood.

Challenges:

·      Travel time and location may be a barrier.

·      Some people find face-to-face sessions overwhelming or intense.

Remote Counselling: Support from Anywhere

Online counselling brings therapy into the comfort of your own space. This can feel safer for some, allowing them to open up more easily. It also makes therapy more accessible, especially for those with mobility issues, busy schedules, or social anxiety.

Benefits of remote counselling:

·      No need to travel so sessions can fit more easily into life.

·      More choice in finding the right therapist, as location isn’t a limitation.

·      Feeling comfortable in your own space may help with opening up.

Challenges:

·      Technology can be unreliable at times.

·      It may feel harder to connect without sharing a physical space.

·      Boundaries between life and therapy can blur when sessions happen at home.

Why Boundaries Matter in Therapy

Regardless of whether therapy happens face-to-face or remotely, one thing remains crucial: boundaries. These aren’t about creating distance but about maintaining a space where both the client and the counsellor can work effectively.

Some people may feel the urge to text their therapist between sessions for reassurance, advice, or support. While this is completely understandable, most counsellors don’t offer messaging outside of sessions, and there’s a good reason for this. Therapy is a structured space and sessions allow time for deep exploration, rather than quick fixes or reactive responses. This structure helps you to build resilience, allowing you to develop a new way of being that can be adapted to any difficulties you may face. If you learn that there is a therapist available to tell you what to do via text message whenever you are struggling, you will never find this sense of resilience, peace and confidence. Also, your therapist is simply not always available. They may be in sessions with other clients or taking care of their own well-being.

Boundaries help the work be effective because knowing there is a set time for therapy can make the process more intentional and contained.

Instead of messaging outside of sessions, it can be helpful to:

·      Write thoughts down to bring to the next session.

·      Use grounding techniques to manage emotions in the moment.

·      Reflect on what’s coming up and what might be needed in therapy.

Finding What’s Right for You

Both face-to-face and remote counselling can be powerful, and neither is better than the other, it’s about what feels right for you. What matters most is feeling safe, heard, and able to engage with the process. Also within that, knowing that the therapeutic relationship has boundaries and this is part of what makes it work.

Therapy isn’t about having constant access to a counsellor, it’s about creating a space where healing can unfold in its own time, in a way that supports long-term growth.